We have this ward challenge to read the Book of Mormon in 2 months-- seriously, this has been really hard for me because it is like 5 or 6 chapters a day. If you miss your reading for a few days, you feel overwhelmed because you have so far to catch up to.
I had one of those moments, though, when I was grateful for my reading and the thoughts it brought to forefront of my mind. My husband is a surgical resident (i.e. he works a load of hours), he's Elder's Quorum President, and we have 3 small children. At times I feel totally alone and overwhelmed. To top things off he has worked as the 'night float' for 2 months now: this means he's working 6 PM- 6 AM (though he get's home around 9:00 AM usually), 6 nights a week. The rest of his existence is spent sleeping, falling asleep, or talking about going to sleep.
A few weeks ago, my son left left a hose on near our window well. When my husband came outside, he panicked (you see: we've left the hose on before and a basement flood was the result). When he rushed downstairs, the trickling noise coming from the wall indicated the worst: water was gushing in under the floorboards.
In the ensuing panic, several thoughts crossed my mind: 1) Why is this happening to me (again)? 2) Doesn't Heavenly Father really know how hard life is for me right now? 3) How could Heavenly Father let this happen-- this is too much for me right now?
As my mind was going through these complaints, the words of Laman and Lemuel that I had read just a week before came echoing into my head, "Thou hast declared unto us hard things, more than we are able to bear." (1 Nephi 16:1).
At this moment it struck me that I was taking the attitude of Laman and Lemuel-- complaining against Heavenly Father, instead of rejoicing in his goodness. In most of my Book of Mormon readings, I generally empathize with Nephi and consider myself to be more like him. I've never conciously caught myself in the attitude like Laman and Lemuel. This was a great wake-up call for me. I remembered furthur reading about Laman and Lemuel and it seemed that when the trials arose, that was when the murmuring began. Hmmm, a bow breaks (my son floods the basement), let's tie up our brother and kill our father (I chastise my Heavenly Father for making things too rough for me).
I don't want to take a Laman and Lemuel attitude in life. When I caught myself doing so, I tried to change my perspective. Instead of complaining to Heavenly Father about how hard this was I thought of the good things: we caught the flood early, we've had a flood before so we know what to do about it, my husband was actually around (and awake) that morning. With a quick change of attitude, this trial suddenly didn't seem so horrible.
My testimony was also strengthened and renewed. I was reminded how important it is to read the scriptures frequently so words can resonate in your mind and help you out in your own life.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Lessons from Laman and Lemuel
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3 comments:
Thank you for this post, Camilla!!
I've been going through some fertility issues lately and have found myself in situation where I'm questioning the Lord and his plan. Why me? Why not someone who doesn't want children or would get rid of the baby?
I was talking to a wonderful friend about my woes and she very calmly reminded me that God has a plan for all of us and we should trust to put ourselves in his hands. That simple, primary reminder has helped me so much!!
Trust. Of course. It seems so simple and elementary but it's the first thing thrown out the window when times get tough.
Yes, the Lord won't give us any more than we can handle but that doesn't mean that we can't only handle things by placing ourselves in His care.
As a mother (who's often left alone also) my instinct is to just run the show. Take care of every one and every thing and not stop until the job is done, including whatever personal issues I may be having. Sometimes the answer is not, fix this and move on...sometimes it's drop to your knees, humble yourself and let the Lord help you.
I found a Wonderful site on Isaiah!
http://www.isaiahexplained.com/
The site has free lessons on every chapter.
Very well done and in the author’s own voice.
Every Isaiah Chapter has the Analytical Commentary of Isaiah. Enjoy this personable verse-by-verse commentary of Isaiah by well-known Hebrew scholar Avraham Gileadi.
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Temple President.
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